If you are worried about money and feeling stressed it is likely that you will be arguing more – with your partner and with your kids.
Even if the arguments are mainly with your partner and you try to keep your differences behind closed doors, your kids will pick up the atmosphere. And those rows which take you unawares are hard to conceal from the children anyway.
If you can’t stop the arguments you can manage the fall out better
BE AWARE! How kids react to their parents arguing:
- Copy cats: Kids may react by arguing with each other or arguing with you to get your attention, especially if it stops you arguing.
- Behaving badly: When your child acts up it can be a clever way of distracting you from your quarrel.
- Keeping out of the way: That may be just what you want, but a child who is quiet and withdraws may actually be frightened and worried, but feel unable to tell anyone.
- Parents little helpers: Kids can be very supportive when their mums and dads are under pressure, offering cuddles and cups of tea. It’s easy to think they are fine – and they may be. But their concern could be a sign they are afraid that their parents can’t cope or that it’s their fault their mum and dad are unhappy and fighting.
But don’t burden them. Just say it’s a tough time and you are stressed.
Tell them it’s not their fault, you love them and you are sorting it.
- Try to argue better!
Kids learn how to manage this and all the conflicts in their own lives by watching how it is managed by the adults around them.