Attitudes towards sex have changed a lot recently.
In the past few years, we’ve had soft-porn novels topping the best-sellers lists, market analysts have found that 40% of British women aged 18 to 70 own a sex toy, and the global sex toy market is expected to grow to $40bn by 2022.
Couples now seem more willing to experiment in the bedroom than ever before. As mentioned on our blog, an online survey of 2,500 people visiting Lovehoney.co.uk found that two-thirds of visitors had used either handcuffs, blindfolds or whips in the bedroom.
Perhaps all this talk of light bondage, role play and use of sex toys has got you curious.
Talk about it
Introducing new things into your sexual relationship can be fun, but also a little scary. You may worry that your partner will laugh at your fantasy or reject your suggestion. But you won’t know until you ask. Talk about it in a safe, comfortable place where you won’t be interrupted. Explain what you want to try in the bedroom and why you want to try it.
Your partner may feel insecure and think that you are unsatisfied with your sex life. Re-assure them that you are satisfied with your sexual life, but would like to try something new.
Just remember that what you propose to do in bed should provide mutual satisfaction. If one of you is not happy with it – find something else you’d both like to try.
Take it slow
Start by introducing small things into your sexual relationship – such as new positions, or having sex in a different room. Making these slow, small introductions will open the door to more novel ideas.
Depending on what you want to do, you should keep safety in mind. For example, if you plan on using handcuffs, make sure you know where the keys are – and that the keys work. Nothing kills the mood like having to call the fire brigade to free you from the bedpost!
Playing together and trying new, adventurous things in the bedroom encourages us to be imaginative, open and trusting, which are all key ingredients to romance. The new experiences you gain through trying new things in bed will help you learn more about what you do and don’t like in bed.
Learn more about how sex affects your relationship, and how to improve your sex life by visiting our Sex, Intimacy and Romance section.