Hi, I am a 21-year-old girl and my boyfriend is 22 we have been together for 7 months now. Our sex life was good at first but its kinda getting bored for my boyfriend in my opinion. I am not very exciting when it comes to sex and inexperienced. My boyfriend has had sex with over 40 girls and I have never really had proper sex and in my previous relationship sex was non-existed. And I am not very confident with my body and I don’t like being naked and never did.
My boyfriend thinks that I am lazy in bed but the truth is I don’t want him to see me like a slut because he often imagines me having sex with my ex and in the past, he used to get put off by it but he never really confronted to me. And I have an issue with him watching porn during sex cause it puts me off but sometimes I feel guilty for telling him not to cause I have never been much of a help in bed. but sometimes I feel like all he wants is sex not having sex with me. I sometimes throw strop cause he makes me give him a blow job whilst he was watching porn. I never really thought I would have an issue with my boyfriend watching porn but I guess its cause I love him too much?
And one thing I don’t like about him is that he rushes things. I almost feel like its just sex and I don’t know how to make things romantic rather than just having sex. I want him to make me feel like he feels special making love to me not just like having sex. I don’t really know if I should blame him for rushing cause we are both from an Asian background and we are not allowed to have BF/GF stays over at house so when we meet up once a week it’s all about sex and during weekdays he goes to uni and I’m busy with my own life. Sometimes I want to tell him to go somewhere and make things romantic cause I don’t want us to spend all our time having sex but will I make him upset by it?
Sometimes I want to just hang out with him and take pictures and be a normal couple rather than just stay in a hotel room and argue. Am I being selfish? I have said that to him before and he said that he wants to spend time alone and not in public he wants it to be just us cause it’s more special. What do I do to improve our sex life and relationship?