Are you ready for your next speed dating event?
It can be overwhelming trying to figure out what to wear, subjects to talk about with your potential dates, and how you can stand out in the crowd. Follow these speed dating tips to change your love life!
1: Dress your best
Consider the setting of your speed date when deciding what to wear.
For men, you don’t need to wear a suit unless it’s something that you put on daily. A nice pair of jeans and a dress shirt will help you look casual but well-groomed.
For all the females, don’t feel like you need to overdress, but wear what you need to feel confident! You need to consider the setting and the location of the speed date. Wear comfortable shoes if you are going to be walking for a while or standing for long periods. You want to be able to be yourself, so a nice pair of jeans and a dressy blouse is very fitting for the occasion.
You want your date to see what you look like on a typical evening out.
2: Make a great FIRST impression
First impressions are always especially important, but even more so on a speed date! You have limited time to impress your date. You may be uncomfortable but remember that so are all your dates. At the beginning of each date, take a minute to introduce yourself and shake hands. Miinglemag.com suggests it is essential to try to be supportive by giving them 100 percent of your attention. This may be the first date of many, so make this first one worth remembering.
3: Ask the right questions
Most importantly, be yourself and ask straightforward questions. Here’s a list of some simple speed date questions to start the conversation:
What is your job?
Do you have any pets?
Where do you like to go on dates?
What are your hobbies?
These simple questions are easy to answer and keep the conversation moving along. There’s no need to ask difficult questions that will make your partner anxious.
4: Be honest about yourself but know what NOT to say
Be genuine and honest with your speed dating partner. You may not have the same interests, but that’s okay. There’s no need to pretend to like something your partner is interested in because they can move on to someone else that is. Some topics are off-limits. Don’t talk about drugs, crimes, or anything that could say, “I spent some time in jail.”
5: Exes are off the table
Speed dates are quick and are about getting to know each other. Don’t waste that valuable time talking about exes for any reason. You don’t want to come off as if you have not moved on. You may also come off bitter or resentful, and you don’t want to start a date like that.
6: Tone down your social life
Spend a lot of weekends binge drinking with friends? No one needs to hear about your drunk adventures because that doesn’t define you or help the other person get to know you. It may also be a red flag for your date.
7: No bragging
Bragging tends to be unattractive, and you don’t want to come across as though you think you are amazing. Confidence is critical, but boasting is a turnoff. Open the conversation up to things that you want to be good at first.
8: Use positive body language
The adage “Actions speak louder than words” holds in the speed dating sphere. How you carry yourself and respond physically will give off an impression, good or bad.
So, make it a point to smile and laugh, avoid crossing your arms across your chest (this comes off as defensive), and keep eye contact often. You want to portray yourself as confident, but not cocky.
9: Don’t talk too much (but don’t sit there in silence either!)
Many speed daters notice that their social skills go out the window at events. You don’t want to hog the conversation and come off as selfish. But you also don’t want to sit there in awkward silence or give one-word answers. Try to balance the conversation so that it’s tit for tat (a near-equal back and forth close to 50/50).
10: Put your phone on silent and put it away
There’s nothing more off-putting than being on a date with somebody who continuously checks their phone. It’s rude to waste the few minutes you have with your date to scout your Twitter feed or respond to the group chat.
This also disrupts the flow and focus of the conversation.
Unless there’s an emergency, you’re getting your date’s number or showing them a picture on your phone; your iPhone should be on silent and in your pocket until the event is over.
11: Make sure you’re mentally prepared
Dates take effort on both sides.
You want to make sure that you’re 100% present, as the person across the table might be your future partner. The last thing you want is to be on edge, tired, or mentally drained while you’re meeting someone new.
To avoid that: Sign up for speed dating events that fit into your schedule best. That means don’t go to events that start right after a stressful eight-hour work shift, are the night before a big project is due, or that you only registered for because your most recent ex texted you the night before.
12: Mingle after the event ends
Like most events, speed dating events have a set start and end time.
Yet, the people most interested in finding a partner seem to hang around a little longer once the event is over. This is prime time to talk to the guy or gal who caught your eye the most.
Mingle after the event without the pressure of a clock.
Is speed dating successful? Statistically, speed dating has a higher success rate than online dating, especially in cases where you get matched with others. Good luck at your next speed dating event!