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I'm worried for my girlfriend

Posted by: Anonymous
Tue 11, Apr 2017 at 5:38pm
Making a Commitment

I've been with my girlfriend for almost 5 months now. We live about 70 km apart from eachother, both at our own parents. She's 18 and I'm 17.

I have two problems with our relationship, I'll address them one at a time.

The first problem is that my girlfriend has depression and it's not good, she lives in the country and doesn't have a single friend in the area. She gets very lonely and thus it gets her more depressed. When I met her I didn't know about this, we got together rather quickly. So I've become her only hope and she's dependent of me. I can only visit her every second weekend and when I'm away, she occasionally gets very depressed and she's once so far cut herself. She had cut herself before meeting me, but had stopped when she met me. She has, a few times, said that I've saved her life, which I and her sister very much agree on. My point is, taking care of her and worrying has really been stressing me. I'm not enough to keep her busy, I'm all she thinks about. I've considered breaking up with her, a it would relieve her of the burden of waiting, but on the other hand, would make her sad that I left her, exposing her to dangerous things she could do to herself. I've also considered and taken action on trying to get her friends, but she's shy and refuses to work on it on her own.

The second problem is much shorter, and kind of part of the first one. All the caring and worrying has strongly changed my part of the relationship. I've started to feel more like a carer than her lover. I love her, but I don't know if I'm really happy with her anymore. I just want the best for her.

I'd love advice on this matter. I don't know what to do.

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  • User-anonymous Sadia03 Flag

    Have you spoken to her about her depression? A better understanding of what is causing the self harm may make it easier to prevent.

    Wed 12, Apr 2017 at 1:21am