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What other couples say about finding time for each other

Tags: Difficulty, sharing time, spending time together, working, looking after children, work life balance, managing time, raising children, relationship help

Being a partner, parent, working, caring and doing all the other things we do means finding time to be with your partner can often be problematic. Lots of couples find that couple time can be very hard to find. Below you will find some quotes from other couples who struggle to find the time to be together.

Ciaran, Birmingham
"The only time we have together we are in the same house but doing different things."

Steven, York
"We've lost the time we used to spend together … space to be with other people, space to breathe and do other things."

Sarah, London
“Now, though, I don’t go out a lot. My husband is away so much and we don’t have the opportunity. I am also the taxi which is a pretty time-consuming occupation for somebody with two teenage daughters who are out and about all the time.”

Angela, Warrington
“Apart from the odd meal out, we don’t really have any time together. My husband gets back late anyway and often the girls are still up anyway.”

Wendy, Southampton
“So the thing that changed my relationship when my younger daughter arrived was the special needs aspect of the thing … I used to saturate myself with information about her condition. I was always tired. I was raising two children and all my time and effort went into that.”

Tracy, Bristol
“That’s the thing – we all have a wish list of all these things we would do if you had time. But I know just at the moment that if I make that time I would start feeling guilty about taking some time for myself. I just keep on, and I’ll think about the future when it comes along.”

Julie, South Wales
“We don’t really have that much time together any more, my son goes to bed at 9, and my partner comes in at 8, and now his daughter is here we get no time together now at all.”

Ellen, South London
“Work, sleep, cooking, cleaning, shopping, school run, doing the garden, swimming lessons, ballet lessons, brownies, seeing friends, running the house, organising stuff, paying bills, laundry, hospital appointments, clinic, checking in on my mum, the list goes on and on – spending time with my partner drops off the list! It’s not that it isn’t important but if someone would just make the day longer then I’d have time!!”

Harjeet, Manchester
“When we’ve had a moment together, just a cup of tea just to check we are on the same page – then off we go again team mum and dad, until the next moment it’s just the two of us – we probably get that maybe, um once a year, maybe not that bad maybe once a month! Things are always better though when we check in together.”

Issy, Sussex
“No one told me that being a mum, however much I love it, would take away the bit of me that’s a wife, partner and I suppose lover.  I miss that.”

Martin, London
“I look back to the time when we could while away a whole evening with a take-away and a bottle of wine – nothing flashy or anything, just the two of us. That was good. It doesn’t happen anymore.”

Hugh, London
“My mum babysat the other day, we went to the pub and we had a couple of drinks. Neither of us had had a drink for so long – my mum must have thought we were a pair of naughty teenagers getting home at 10.30 a little bit wobbly! It was great to be out!”

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Comments

  • Cc Morwenna Flag

    To the commenter above, I am so sorry your partner's behaviour is making you feel crap - can I suggest you repost as a new post on the Relationship Forum of this site, you might find you get some really helpful responses and suggestions then from the site community.  Good luck with the way forward.

    Mon 25, Jul 2011 at 8:32pm
  • User-anonymous Anonymous Flag

    well, any time that me and my partner have together- he decides to play on his xbox or you tube! even first thing in the morning! makes you feel pretty crap!

    Mon 25, Jul 2011 at 5:56pm
  • User-anonymous Pinot13 Flag

    I have no desire to spend time together with my husband - I prefer to spend time on my own or on Facebook or meet up with the girls - what does that say about my relationship.  I agree with Issy from Sussex

    Wed 11, Aug 2010 at 8:46pm