What do I do now?
I have just recently split up with my husband of 10 years, we have been together for 13 years in total. We are very lucky and have 2 wonderful children together.
Throughout our married life we really have had our ups and downs and like most people we have worked through these. My husband has walked out on me and then us 4 times. Each and every time I have forgiven him and taken him back but not this time.
He left again last week but this time it's different as he actually told our children when I wasn't even there - this is unforgivable.
During the years I have remained faithful and I have read many posts saying that they didn't intend to have feelings for another man, myself included. Now that has happened to me. A year ago I judged people who strayed and often said they should have respect for their partner and let them know they have feeling for someone else. I have not practiced what I have preached.
It started happening at the beginning of a work contract. I meet this guy and he caught my eye and it jolted me somewhat. I put these feelings to the back of my mind as I am married and he was due to be married.
Things continued for months and one day we met up, wrong I know.
When he kissed me I felt alive like I haven't for a long time.
We have continued our affair and see each other whenever we can.
He is getting married in June and it breaks my heart although I haven't told him this.
I am being unfair and should end it but I can't find the strength to.
I know he will never leave for me, I just need to talk to someone who has been through this as I can't talk to my family and friends for obvious reasons.
I do expect a fair amount of critiscism which I do deserve.
Thanks for your time