I need some advice and views on what is going on in my relationship currently. I have been with my boyfriend for 4 years now. We have a 2 year old daughter and we love together. Prior to dating, we had been friends for like 6 years so he has been a huge part of my life for a very long time. We have had a lot of up's and down's in our relationship...his drug addiction being the biggest of all. For the first 2 years of our relationship he had a serious drug problem. I supported him through this financially, I basically took care of his every need. He didn't work or do anything really. Finally after having our daughter he decided to go to rehab. He has now been clean for a year and a half. I know I should be thankful that he is clean and an amazing father who now works and helps support our family, but I'm just not in love with him anymore. Yes, I have lots of love for him in my heart, but I'm certainly not in love with him. I have so much resent and anger built up from the past that it's hard to move forward. I also feel like I've grown up so much over the past few years and I'm not the same person I was when we started dating. I'm much stronger and wiser now.
A few months ago I ran into a ex-boyfriend of mine from the past and ever since then I can't stop thinking about him. We text and chat on facebook all the time. We have even met each other out at bars, but nothing physical has ever taken place. I believe I'm still in love with this man. I've told him how I feel and I'm pretty sure he feels the same way, but he won't really have that discussion with me because I'm still involved with my boyfriend. I'm completely torn over this situation. it's not even completely about this other guy because I have been unhappy for a long time. This other guy has just made it easier to see. The few friends that know about this feel like it is black and white...I need to leave my boyfriend. But, when you share a life and child with someone it's just not that easy. Plus, I don't know how my boyfriend would make it in life without me. He has depended on me for so long. His family doesn't live close by either to be able to help him out. I also don't handle confrontation very well at all and I have been having severe anxiety over what to do. I know if I tell my boyfriend how I'm feeling he will not take it very well and a big fight will ensue. Please help!!!