My partner recently became impotent, this is I'm sure a short term reaction to extreme stress mainly at work. This has completely devastated him; I've tried to be caring, supportive and not be sexually demanding. Instead of as I'd hoped this making things easier for him it seems to have made it worse and so I have in his mind become an additional stress. I've no idea what to do for the best; I'm generally very emotionally intelligent but am completely and utterly lost as to what to do for the best. We talk and enjoy each others company still but he avoids us being alone as much as possible.
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DaveAngel on 01 June 2009 at 4:16pm said...
Impotence is physiological/psychological, or both.
Has he had a health check? The main cause is cardiovascular. Does he smoke and or is unfit? This is the main cause of impotence.
Guys who have these issues become very vulnerable and insecure about not being able to satisfy their partner. Their insecurities skyrocket, and often they are afraid to admit there is a problem and talk.
You have to bite the bullet and arrange an appointment with a G.P. He might not understand that roughly one in ten men have this problem, but him understanding this fact will help. He has got to have a health check.
Why r u so sure it is work stress? Sometimes this makes the libido even stronger. It might be something else. If it is physiological, then it is simple. If it is psychological, then it is more subtle but also treatable, with recovery being complete after the issue is resolved.
You mentioned trust...what are the trust issues arising here for him, for you? What was your sex life like before the impotence occurred? Did you guys have some trust problems? Is he afraid you will seek another lover?
Does he find you too sexually demanding?
Daveangel.
Anonymous on 02 June 2009 at 10:40am said...
Diabetes is one medical cause of impotence. A simple check of blood sugar level at lloyds pharmacy could confirm this as possible cause. I hope it is easily remedied for you...